I am far less likely to jump to un-informed judgements about people now. I want to believe that most people do the best they can with what they have. Never has Hillel's admonition of 'not doing to others what is hateful to you' felt more relevant and correct.
I'm interested in this research. My non-scientific feeling is that we become stronger versions of ourselves as we age. The ornery become ornery-er. But it is, perhaps, our diminished bucket of fucks that allows us to be kinder, or at least non-combative, toward those who irritate us.
Still, my fuckbucket has refilled itself during this administration, and I'm not feeling very charitable to those in the cult. I doubt that will change.
Leslie, I have to agree. I cannot find it in my heart to give the benefit of the doubt to those who are deliberately destroying democracy and polluting every value we stand for.
Actually, there is a mathematical basis for altruism. Has to do with the work of Peter Kropotkin and, much later after him, Claude Shannon. I discuss the matter here. This is the link involved, https://www.pinoytoolbox.org/post/darwin-kropotkin-shannon-geeky-world-of-politics. At the moment, I have no time to get it published in an academic journal but academics here in the Philippines are presently aware of my theory.
I think the capacity for compassion grows with self-awareness. When we realize that our own time is limited and may be characterized by some health struggles, some losses...we're more likely to recognize other people's challenges.
Brain chemistry and less time working, to be sure, but also just plain old experience that kindness is stronger than hate. Or at least we know when to keep the old pie-hole zipped!
I think that life experience gives you a deeper meaning to life, you understand that what we accumulate over the years in material wealth or status, in attempts to find happiness, only fulfills our ego, while the feeling of love is essential to fulfilling our soul.
Older altruism is an important phenomenon to track, and thanks for this! Another factor, at least for women, is explained by the Grandmother Hypothesis. Women, unlike other female primates, live well past menopause because our role as caretakers of grandchildren (with their lengthy period of dependency) was essential to the success of our species. Caring for grandkids requires devotion and altruism. More about that here: https://open.substack.com/pub/stellafosse/p/the-grandmother-hypothesis?r=yq3s3&utm_campaign=post&utm_medium=web&showWelcomeOnShare=false
I am far less likely to jump to un-informed judgements about people now. I want to believe that most people do the best they can with what they have. Never has Hillel's admonition of 'not doing to others what is hateful to you' felt more relevant and correct.
And if not now, when?
I'm interested in this research. My non-scientific feeling is that we become stronger versions of ourselves as we age. The ornery become ornery-er. But it is, perhaps, our diminished bucket of fucks that allows us to be kinder, or at least non-combative, toward those who irritate us.
Still, my fuckbucket has refilled itself during this administration, and I'm not feeling very charitable to those in the cult. I doubt that will change.
Good piece.
Leslie, I have to agree. I cannot find it in my heart to give the benefit of the doubt to those who are deliberately destroying democracy and polluting every value we stand for.
Actually, there is a mathematical basis for altruism. Has to do with the work of Peter Kropotkin and, much later after him, Claude Shannon. I discuss the matter here. This is the link involved, https://www.pinoytoolbox.org/post/darwin-kropotkin-shannon-geeky-world-of-politics. At the moment, I have no time to get it published in an academic journal but academics here in the Philippines are presently aware of my theory.
Thanks for adding this surprising angle to the discussion.
Just in case you are interested, here is another piece.
“Altruism Wins: “Good Wins Over Evil” Tenet”
https://www.pinoytoolbox.org/post/altruism-wins-good-wins-over-evil-tenet
Good evening from the Philippines.
Math and I are not on friendly terms, but I have to say this is fascinating. Thanks for sharing.
The Meanest people I know are my parents and their peers- all on the Theo mid to late 70s
I think the capacity for compassion grows with self-awareness. When we realize that our own time is limited and may be characterized by some health struggles, some losses...we're more likely to recognize other people's challenges.
Susie, true only for those who succumb to the "character flaw" of empathy.
Too bad Trump hasn't mellowed with age. Cruelty for its own sake seems to be his M.O.
It only happens to 75% of us. We know where Trump falls.
What happens to the other 25% and is there any research on the difference?
Haven't seen the science on that one.
absolutely resonates and dead fascinating.
Thanks, Judith!
Nicely done, Mr. Don.
Thank you, my friend.
Brain chemistry and less time working, to be sure, but also just plain old experience that kindness is stronger than hate. Or at least we know when to keep the old pie-hole zipped!
Kathleen, that is so true!
I think that life experience gives you a deeper meaning to life, you understand that what we accumulate over the years in material wealth or status, in attempts to find happiness, only fulfills our ego, while the feeling of love is essential to fulfilling our soul.
Older altruism is an important phenomenon to track, and thanks for this! Another factor, at least for women, is explained by the Grandmother Hypothesis. Women, unlike other female primates, live well past menopause because our role as caretakers of grandchildren (with their lengthy period of dependency) was essential to the success of our species. Caring for grandkids requires devotion and altruism. More about that here: https://open.substack.com/pub/stellafosse/p/the-grandmother-hypothesis?r=yq3s3&utm_campaign=post&utm_medium=web&showWelcomeOnShare=false
WOW. what a great addition to Don's essay!
Stella, thanks for making the connection the the Grandmother Hypothesis. Makes perfect sense.
Interesting!