"A long-time friend whose first language is not English wants to know if I can help write her business plan. My synagogue wants to know if I would help write a grant proposal. My wife has agreed that we will babysit for our four grandchildren. The housing co-op wants me to serve on a committee." This is alllll toooooo much!! Block off that writing time and maybe pick one of these! Rooting for you!
Sounds like a plan. I too in retirement am as busy as I ever was. And I’m happy about it. Mostly. Writing is a priority. So I try and do it in the morning when my brain seems to be freshest.
I'm looking forward to seeing how your new regiment works out! In addition to volunteering, shopping/cooking/cleaning/laundry, errands & chores, etc. I also have caregiving responsibilities. Somehow it's still all manageable, but I could use a little more discipline & structure so I can regroup with more me-time. You've inspired me, thanks!
Bravo, Don! Dare I say it? Setting boundaries is liberating! This has been my year to embrace the word "No." Or, at least to say, "I can't do it today, but how about...?" Setting boundaries gives me greater control over my time and energy.
I share your tortoise-like approach to writing. I also find that deadline-driven writing assignments often improve the outcome.
I feel your pain regarding your wife's NEED to regulate your work ethic to align more with hers. We women do get kind of bossy after years of wrangling children, husbands, and pets. Your manifesto to have boundaries so you can write your book is healthy and sane. By all means, shut the door. Maybe even lock it and possibly soundproof it. (Is that over the top?) And if the temptation to squander some of that four hours on YouTube and social media, feel no guilt. There is inspiration to be had from such sources of unvetted information.
Yeah, this retirement thing is tricky. My brother has a friend who advised: Don't go to the pharmacy and the grocery store on the same day. I am still getting used to my lack of stamina and when I look back at my life I am in awe of my daily activities and busyness. No way Jose, today!
I had a retired friend years ago who said, "I don't know how I ever found time to work." Not coincidentally, he was a UU. Churches (and apparently synagogues) thrive on the efforts of the "wellderly."
As worthy as every cause may be, we must set limits to guard our me-time, our creative life. This will be especially important under the coming administration, when everyone's hair is on fire. A suggestion I like: Pick one cause for activism, whether it's the environment, immigrant rights, queer rights, etc.
This essay hit home because November 1st (the start of NaNoWriMo) arrived while I was still in radiation therapy. In years past I've completed 50,000 words in a month, no problem; this year is different. My mild-mannered partner said yesterday, "You're through with all that! Get on with it!" Of course, he's right. I'm on the far side of cancer surgery and a cardiac procedure in addition to RT, but my stamina hasn't returned. Meanwhile I'm still volunteering for political work, science fairs, etc. Time to take the excellent advice in this essay.
"My wife thinks that whenever she sees me scrolling through Facebook or watching YouTube videos on my computer, that obviously I am not busy. Clearly, she does not fully understand my writing process. Or perhaps I need to rethink my process." Might be good to find ways to be "unbusy" without Facebook and scrolling. Ever-tempting screens are such a curse!.
"A long-time friend whose first language is not English wants to know if I can help write her business plan. My synagogue wants to know if I would help write a grant proposal. My wife has agreed that we will babysit for our four grandchildren. The housing co-op wants me to serve on a committee." This is alllll toooooo much!! Block off that writing time and maybe pick one of these! Rooting for you!
Thanks, Susan. You know I'm rooting for you too.
Sounds like a plan. I too in retirement am as busy as I ever was. And I’m happy about it. Mostly. Writing is a priority. So I try and do it in the morning when my brain seems to be freshest.
I share your priorities, though I found I was no longer a morning person after I stopped drinking coffee.
I'm looking forward to seeing how your new regiment works out! In addition to volunteering, shopping/cooking/cleaning/laundry, errands & chores, etc. I also have caregiving responsibilities. Somehow it's still all manageable, but I could use a little more discipline & structure so I can regroup with more me-time. You've inspired me, thanks!
Wendl, I'm pleased that you find it inspiring. Good luck!
Bravo, Don! Dare I say it? Setting boundaries is liberating! This has been my year to embrace the word "No." Or, at least to say, "I can't do it today, but how about...?" Setting boundaries gives me greater control over my time and energy.
I share your tortoise-like approach to writing. I also find that deadline-driven writing assignments often improve the outcome.
Thanks, Jackie. So glad to hear you've added No to your vocabulary. A smart move!
I feel your pain regarding your wife's NEED to regulate your work ethic to align more with hers. We women do get kind of bossy after years of wrangling children, husbands, and pets. Your manifesto to have boundaries so you can write your book is healthy and sane. By all means, shut the door. Maybe even lock it and possibly soundproof it. (Is that over the top?) And if the temptation to squander some of that four hours on YouTube and social media, feel no guilt. There is inspiration to be had from such sources of unvetted information.
Sue, I so appreciate your understanding of my "method." Thanks!
Yeah, this retirement thing is tricky. My brother has a friend who advised: Don't go to the pharmacy and the grocery store on the same day. I am still getting used to my lack of stamina and when I look back at my life I am in awe of my daily activities and busyness. No way Jose, today!
But anyway, Judith, what's the hurry? You've got all the time in the world!
Fortunately, my "Me" time is for reading your newsletter and posting a comment here and there.
Unfortunately, I will now not be calling you between 12-4 PM!!
(However I do expect to be thanked in your book.....!)
Ronaldo, I have made a note of your request.
I had a retired friend years ago who said, "I don't know how I ever found time to work." Not coincidentally, he was a UU. Churches (and apparently synagogues) thrive on the efforts of the "wellderly."
As worthy as every cause may be, we must set limits to guard our me-time, our creative life. This will be especially important under the coming administration, when everyone's hair is on fire. A suggestion I like: Pick one cause for activism, whether it's the environment, immigrant rights, queer rights, etc.
This essay hit home because November 1st (the start of NaNoWriMo) arrived while I was still in radiation therapy. In years past I've completed 50,000 words in a month, no problem; this year is different. My mild-mannered partner said yesterday, "You're through with all that! Get on with it!" Of course, he's right. I'm on the far side of cancer surgery and a cardiac procedure in addition to RT, but my stamina hasn't returned. Meanwhile I'm still volunteering for political work, science fairs, etc. Time to take the excellent advice in this essay.
Stella, I hope your recovery continues apace and your stamina returns forthwith. Thanks for the personal testimonial.
"My wife thinks that whenever she sees me scrolling through Facebook or watching YouTube videos on my computer, that obviously I am not busy. Clearly, she does not fully understand my writing process. Or perhaps I need to rethink my process." Might be good to find ways to be "unbusy" without Facebook and scrolling. Ever-tempting screens are such a curse!.
Sound advice, Annette. Thanks. I need to work on my impulse control.
As do I, dear Don. Do as I say, not as I do.