Wonderful post. Having the pleasure of knowing you for the past 50+ years, take solace in knowing your memory will not be that of a curmudgeon, but rather of a deeply witty, charmingly funny, loving brother!
This is probably my favorite of your columns. Wise, funny, and you do a beautiful job giving us a picture of you. As for the topic, my parents and aunt told us (including my kids) many stories of their lives and those of their parents, which I treasure. I will make an extra effort to pass those along to my grandkids. And though I'm not a curmudgeon by nature, I have to say that one of the things I've really enjoyed about growing older is having the permission/taking the opportunity to be cranky. And, as my wise friend Judy says, "dispense wisdom" (or what I think is wisdom, and, per the previous sentence, not caring if others disagree).
Your column really made me think. I think crankiness has its good side. I have always loved the fact that some older people in my life seemed more willing to speak their minds. And while sometimes, they may have appeared to be "cranky" I found their honesty refreshing (and often funny). So I don't think crankiness per se is necessarily a bad thing but more a matter of how much and how often. I intend to work on the amount and frequency of my crankiness but do not intend to purposely eliminate all of it going forward.
I really loved this article, Don. On my grandmother's final trip to Canada from England (which we didn't realize was her last trip), we had a biographer come and do a series of interviews with her. The biographer then created a book for the family and gave us all the cassette tapes. My grandmother returned to the UK and died suddenly while having tea and cakes with friends. We were so glad we had the finished biography and the recordings. Without them, I had great memories (and thankfully, I inherited a lot of her DNA) but it's still lovely to have the book and the tapes. Personally, I'm aiming for sage ;) Thanks again for this week's article!
I absolutely wish you well and am confident that your lovability, if that's a word, and your wisdom will shine through your crankiness. I'm inclined to think our legacy is more about modeling than anything we consciously say to the next generation. If they witness your love and wisdom, they will receive it and pass it on like a basketball.
Glad to learn that I too am a sage… 😊 I think curmudgeon-ness grows within us as we age as we have to stifle true opinions along the way so it finally has to break out of its suppression. But the good news might be that there’s finally no guilt! Right? Not sure if or how I might end up being remembered. Something to think about…
Don--Great column, as always! Your categories of old men made me laugh. But we ladies need more choices as old women. If I think of any, I will let you know.
The continuous learning mode hits home for me. I just learned that Goucher College is working with Edenwald to develop a university-model senior living community that encourages continuous learning for its residents--lots of libraries, classes, trips, interactions with college students, etc. If I ever need senior housing, that would be my ideal setting.
One of my greatest role models for aging was a teacher in England who was a witty curmudgeon, and whose grumpiness grew stronger with age. Her honesty that, no, everything is NOT awesome, and her testimony that, no, everything has not been the way it is now, were a breath of fresh air. My only concern, in retrospect, is that she had a hard life, and I wish could have been happier. That said, her funeral was packed full of people who absolutely adored her. We talked afterward about how difficult she had been, and how much we loved her. Some of us had come a long way to say goodbye.
Reading some short stories by Roddy Doyle, one called "Life Without Children" is also the title of the book. Doyle is in his mid-60's and his characters seem to have similar legacy concerns - to which I relate as well! One character remembers his father constantly asking "Where are my pills?" and how it became a joke with the grandchildren (the narrator's now-grown kids...) Very touching and funny stuff!
Wonderful post. Having the pleasure of knowing you for the past 50+ years, take solace in knowing your memory will not be that of a curmudgeon, but rather of a deeply witty, charmingly funny, loving brother!
This is probably my favorite of your columns. Wise, funny, and you do a beautiful job giving us a picture of you. As for the topic, my parents and aunt told us (including my kids) many stories of their lives and those of their parents, which I treasure. I will make an extra effort to pass those along to my grandkids. And though I'm not a curmudgeon by nature, I have to say that one of the things I've really enjoyed about growing older is having the permission/taking the opportunity to be cranky. And, as my wise friend Judy says, "dispense wisdom" (or what I think is wisdom, and, per the previous sentence, not caring if others disagree).
Good issue, young man!
Don - I love receiving your posts. Always thoughtful. Always well-written.
As long as I'm still kicking, you'll be remembered as a wise and patient mentor. I'm sure I'm not the only one.
Without your encouragement, I might have given up. Instead, I went on to share truly lifesaving information with thousands. So, that's on you, too.
I still hate to write, but at least I have the confidence to do it when I have to. :-)
This was a great read Don and I wish you luck. Have you heard the song John put on his last CD "What will they say about me" It fits your question
Great story. I really, really try not to be grumpy but sometimes it makes it way out.
Your column really made me think. I think crankiness has its good side. I have always loved the fact that some older people in my life seemed more willing to speak their minds. And while sometimes, they may have appeared to be "cranky" I found their honesty refreshing (and often funny). So I don't think crankiness per se is necessarily a bad thing but more a matter of how much and how often. I intend to work on the amount and frequency of my crankiness but do not intend to purposely eliminate all of it going forward.
Thanks Don; I love this column. A good reminder to keep growing and learning.
I really loved this article, Don. On my grandmother's final trip to Canada from England (which we didn't realize was her last trip), we had a biographer come and do a series of interviews with her. The biographer then created a book for the family and gave us all the cassette tapes. My grandmother returned to the UK and died suddenly while having tea and cakes with friends. We were so glad we had the finished biography and the recordings. Without them, I had great memories (and thankfully, I inherited a lot of her DNA) but it's still lovely to have the book and the tapes. Personally, I'm aiming for sage ;) Thanks again for this week's article!
I absolutely wish you well and am confident that your lovability, if that's a word, and your wisdom will shine through your crankiness. I'm inclined to think our legacy is more about modeling than anything we consciously say to the next generation. If they witness your love and wisdom, they will receive it and pass it on like a basketball.
Glad to learn that I too am a sage… 😊 I think curmudgeon-ness grows within us as we age as we have to stifle true opinions along the way so it finally has to break out of its suppression. But the good news might be that there’s finally no guilt! Right? Not sure if or how I might end up being remembered. Something to think about…
Don--Great column, as always! Your categories of old men made me laugh. But we ladies need more choices as old women. If I think of any, I will let you know.
The continuous learning mode hits home for me. I just learned that Goucher College is working with Edenwald to develop a university-model senior living community that encourages continuous learning for its residents--lots of libraries, classes, trips, interactions with college students, etc. If I ever need senior housing, that would be my ideal setting.
One of my greatest role models for aging was a teacher in England who was a witty curmudgeon, and whose grumpiness grew stronger with age. Her honesty that, no, everything is NOT awesome, and her testimony that, no, everything has not been the way it is now, were a breath of fresh air. My only concern, in retrospect, is that she had a hard life, and I wish could have been happier. That said, her funeral was packed full of people who absolutely adored her. We talked afterward about how difficult she had been, and how much we loved her. Some of us had come a long way to say goodbye.
Reading some short stories by Roddy Doyle, one called "Life Without Children" is also the title of the book. Doyle is in his mid-60's and his characters seem to have similar legacy concerns - to which I relate as well! One character remembers his father constantly asking "Where are my pills?" and how it became a joke with the grandchildren (the narrator's now-grown kids...) Very touching and funny stuff!