Thanks for clarifying that last paragraph! I'm happier in a way as I'm older, not yet in my 60’s. However I'm not happy with how my body is changing. I'm happy that I don't have a boss to report to or anymore staff to manage. Exhausting and stressful. Generally more relaxed and less affected by other peoples opinions or actions. Long live old people!
Sorry about that mangled paragraph at the end. It should have read:
One important final note: happiness correlates with lower mortality. A study in the United Kingdom that followed 9,000 adults in their 60s found that in the least happy 25%, the death rate was 29%. In the happiest 25%, the death rate was 9%.
Yes! I'm happy, and I know it! And I, for whatever reason, didn't expect it to be so. Actually, I had little concept of what this era would be like. I'm finding that finally pursuing some neglected outlets...not always frivolous...have been doubly pleasurable. My husband has been a variety of Grandma Moses. In his senior, "retirement" years he is tirelessly pursuing the inventing and development of medical devices for the airway. The investment of time and energy have been considerable, but, oh, engaging in relationships with the medical and academic communities have been rewarding and stimulating on the way to producing instruments that may benefit many.
I should add that the upside of my U-curve started about 20 years ago, when I got a job I loved and moved where I'd always wanted to live. I knew what I wanted and, with fewer constraints due to the phase in my life, was able to take more control.
Thanks for addressing this--a very common misconception and sometimes a self-fulfilling prophecy if you don't manage your own expectations (reinforced, as always by our youth-obsessed culture). I've always been inclined to be happy--a temperament and not of my doing but a nice way to be--but I'm definitely in the U-curve camp. My best time before now was high school, and thanks to Facebook, I've reconnected with many of those folks in recent years. Like Michelle, I've enjoyed caring less about others' opinions and being the wise person in the room (of course, depending on who else in in the room. When I was 45 and my friend Judy turned 50, she said she wanted to spend her birthday dispensing wisdom--I like that idea.) I also greatly enjoy my kids as adults, in a very different and considerably more relaxing way than during the low part of the U-curve. I'm lucky that my family is doing well and I've been able to live with &/or see them during the pandemic. Retirement has certainly added to my enjoyment; I'm sitting here at noon still in my jammies with a book and a crossword puzzle by my side. So yes, I'm happy.
i don't know about "happy". "content"? "settled"? "grateful for what i have, who i am/have become"? have i found meaning in those things? been able to channel all of my creativity into new ways that bring me joy, contentment? yes. i'd ask: what do you expect out of life? out of yourself? others? are they realistic expectations? if our expectations don't match our reality whether that reality is in the mirror or the world around us, well, we'll never be content—
Thanks for clarifying that last paragraph! I'm happier in a way as I'm older, not yet in my 60’s. However I'm not happy with how my body is changing. I'm happy that I don't have a boss to report to or anymore staff to manage. Exhausting and stressful. Generally more relaxed and less affected by other peoples opinions or actions. Long live old people!
I think the trick is to remind yourself that your body is not you, it's just a container. And rust never sleeps.
Sorry about that mangled paragraph at the end. It should have read:
One important final note: happiness correlates with lower mortality. A study in the United Kingdom that followed 9,000 adults in their 60s found that in the least happy 25%, the death rate was 29%. In the happiest 25%, the death rate was 9%.
Yes! I'm happy, and I know it! And I, for whatever reason, didn't expect it to be so. Actually, I had little concept of what this era would be like. I'm finding that finally pursuing some neglected outlets...not always frivolous...have been doubly pleasurable. My husband has been a variety of Grandma Moses. In his senior, "retirement" years he is tirelessly pursuing the inventing and development of medical devices for the airway. The investment of time and energy have been considerable, but, oh, engaging in relationships with the medical and academic communities have been rewarding and stimulating on the way to producing instruments that may benefit many.
That's great to hear, about both of you!
I should add that the upside of my U-curve started about 20 years ago, when I got a job I loved and moved where I'd always wanted to live. I knew what I wanted and, with fewer constraints due to the phase in my life, was able to take more control.
Thanks for addressing this--a very common misconception and sometimes a self-fulfilling prophecy if you don't manage your own expectations (reinforced, as always by our youth-obsessed culture). I've always been inclined to be happy--a temperament and not of my doing but a nice way to be--but I'm definitely in the U-curve camp. My best time before now was high school, and thanks to Facebook, I've reconnected with many of those folks in recent years. Like Michelle, I've enjoyed caring less about others' opinions and being the wise person in the room (of course, depending on who else in in the room. When I was 45 and my friend Judy turned 50, she said she wanted to spend her birthday dispensing wisdom--I like that idea.) I also greatly enjoy my kids as adults, in a very different and considerably more relaxing way than during the low part of the U-curve. I'm lucky that my family is doing well and I've been able to live with &/or see them during the pandemic. Retirement has certainly added to my enjoyment; I'm sitting here at noon still in my jammies with a book and a crossword puzzle by my side. So yes, I'm happy.
Thanks, Miriam. I'm glad you're happy too.
i don't know about "happy". "content"? "settled"? "grateful for what i have, who i am/have become"? have i found meaning in those things? been able to channel all of my creativity into new ways that bring me joy, contentment? yes. i'd ask: what do you expect out of life? out of yourself? others? are they realistic expectations? if our expectations don't match our reality whether that reality is in the mirror or the world around us, well, we'll never be content—
Great questions. I would settle for content if I had to.