15 Comments

When my late husband was sick, his best friends from high school came to see him. They carried him out of the house and into the bed of our truck and drove him all over our farm, laughing and carrying on like teenagers. It was wonderful. My husband loved it. It’s hard to see someone you love sick, but when we put our fear behind us, those visits become great memories.

Expand full comment

Thank you for covering an important topic in a compassionate way. I’m reversing mild cognitive impairment through the Bredesen Protocal. Having good social interactions is important, as are nutrition, supplements, exercise, meditation, sleep, dental health, and addressing toxicity or infections.

Expand full comment

Excellent advice. Thanks you

Expand full comment
Apr 6Liked by Don Akchin

My wife's cousin (approx age 75) in Belgium has been diagnosed with Alzheimer's, so she and my wife have a monthly Zoom call to talk. I think it was her doctor who suggested this to slow the progression of the disease.

Expand full comment
Apr 6Liked by Don Akchin

It is exactly as you say: Just like ageing people, people with dementia are not treated as people. Unfortunately, I experienced this all the time when working in dementia care (in Sweden and Germany) - and was always bullied by my colleagues when I spoke and interacted with people with dementia at eye level, got involved in their inner world, when trust developed between us and we had fun together. - But it’s mostly about pushing them away, keeping them away and controlling people with dementia. Most people forget that although they have an illness, people with dementia ARE not their illness. Like all people, they have and keep their own personality, wishes, desires, preferences, dreams, talents, hopes and aspirations… The feelings and sensations of people with dementia are very pronounced and always true, never feigned. They stay that way until their last breath. You can learn a lot from them. And the creativity with which they reassemble things and thoughts is that of artists. Only they are not paid for it, they are punished. - There is a very good organization - Reimagining Dementia - whose wise and intellectually open ZOOM meetings I've attended and whose mission statement is: “Spreading and creating more humanity around the world

and leading the end of stigma and the tragedy narrative. We share a vision of care and support that promotes inclusion, relationships, creativity, joy and the possibility of growth for everyone impacted by dementia.“ Link: https://www.reimaginingdementia.com/

Expand full comment
Apr 6Liked by Don Akchin

Please research Validation Training Institute. Their focus is person centered geriatric dementia care developed by Naomi Feil.

Expand full comment
founding

Thanks for such a helpful column. What you recommend makes a lot of sense. I recently learned that my daughter's father-in-law has dementia, so this information will be very useful.

Expand full comment
author

I think ongoing social contact of any kind helps.

Expand full comment
author

Antea, thank you for sharing your first-hand experiences and for sharing this resource. Much appreciated!

Expand full comment
author

Good tip. Thanks for sharing it, Susie.

Expand full comment
author

What a great story! Thanks, Susan.

Expand full comment

Sometimes dementia patients have very active imaginative lives that don't conform to our sense of reality. When I sat with these patients, I always went with their version of events rather than denying their reality. I learned this from my father who carried on an active relationship in his mind with Liza Minnelli. He would say "Liza visited me today" and I would say "How's she doing?"

Expand full comment