Nicely done, Don. I recently read that one should write your own eulogy as a way to judge how well you have lived and whether your moral accounts are balanced.
So sorry to hear of your loss, Don. We never know. A few months ago a young relative dropped dead on his twin brother's porch of a hitherto-undiagnosed heart defect, likely saving the life of his twin. Could happen tomorrow or years from now. I've been pondering writing notes for my memorial service: songs and readings I'd like. And photos. I might not be aware when it happens but it will give me peace now.
I often experience funerals as communal gatherings more than events to honor one particular person. We are called to experience our collective witness to death over and over again until we get it. For me, it's more about taking in the truth of impermanence than a reminder to "do better" in some way.
I agree that we should live well especially as I am 80.
However 3 of our adult children decided 4 yrs ago that I had been an abusive mother ( their sister disagrees) and we have no contact with them or our 6 grandchildren not any explanations
You've experienced a huge loss, Don, I'm sorry. Pieces of our heart and history are wrenched from us when old friends pass. The Pirkei Avot has many profound and timeless messages, no wonder it's always read between Passover and Shavuot.
I’m so sorry for your loss, Don. One of the comments here mentioned writing your own eulogy which I think is a wonderful idea. There’s also a great book about living your life to the fullest (and walks you through writing that eulogy) that I highly recommend. It’s called Your To Die For Life by Karen Salmansohn. It’s terrific.
So sorry, Don. Unexpected loss like this seems to hit so much harder. I have a large family (Mum was one of eleven children, dad one of thirteen), and earlier life involved many dozens of weddings. These days, we seem to only gather at funerals, and whilst there is always a big helping of celebration, the e collective mindset is very different to the anticipation of life and lives ahead that comes with a wedding.
What I take from your fine piece of writing is to live every day. I’m reminded to do that whenever I read you, and I hope it becomes a habit soon!
Thank you for your heartfelt thoughts, Don. I, too, am reeling in shock from our beloved mutual friend's death, which I only learned about yesterday on social media. His departure leaves a huge void in our shared community. May his memory be for a blessing.
I, too, have attended many funerals this year for friends and family members both older and younger than me. It is part of the reason I've become so removed from my usual activity and engagement. My own mortality is staring me in the face, and I find it difficult to write about it. But I'm still working on it.
Nicely done, Don. I recently read that one should write your own eulogy as a way to judge how well you have lived and whether your moral accounts are balanced.
The passing of old friends is difficult. I'm sorry. But I did love the Rabbi's advice.
So sorry to hear of your loss, Don. We never know. A few months ago a young relative dropped dead on his twin brother's porch of a hitherto-undiagnosed heart defect, likely saving the life of his twin. Could happen tomorrow or years from now. I've been pondering writing notes for my memorial service: songs and readings I'd like. And photos. I might not be aware when it happens but it will give me peace now.
I often experience funerals as communal gatherings more than events to honor one particular person. We are called to experience our collective witness to death over and over again until we get it. For me, it's more about taking in the truth of impermanence than a reminder to "do better" in some way.
I agree that we should live well especially as I am 80.
However 3 of our adult children decided 4 yrs ago that I had been an abusive mother ( their sister disagrees) and we have no contact with them or our 6 grandchildren not any explanations
So we hold them dear but try to live fully
Life is a gift
You've experienced a huge loss, Don, I'm sorry. Pieces of our heart and history are wrenched from us when old friends pass. The Pirkei Avot has many profound and timeless messages, no wonder it's always read between Passover and Shavuot.
Amen.
I’m so sorry for your loss, Don. One of the comments here mentioned writing your own eulogy which I think is a wonderful idea. There’s also a great book about living your life to the fullest (and walks you through writing that eulogy) that I highly recommend. It’s called Your To Die For Life by Karen Salmansohn. It’s terrific.
Thank you, Susan. I have been following Karen Salmansohn but you've given me a good reason to buy her book.
So sorry, Don. Unexpected loss like this seems to hit so much harder. I have a large family (Mum was one of eleven children, dad one of thirteen), and earlier life involved many dozens of weddings. These days, we seem to only gather at funerals, and whilst there is always a big helping of celebration, the e collective mindset is very different to the anticipation of life and lives ahead that comes with a wedding.
What I take from your fine piece of writing is to live every day. I’m reminded to do that whenever I read you, and I hope it becomes a habit soon!
Stay well my friend. 🙏
Sean, thank you so much for these words. I really appreciate them.
Thank you for your heartfelt thoughts, Don. I, too, am reeling in shock from our beloved mutual friend's death, which I only learned about yesterday on social media. His departure leaves a huge void in our shared community. May his memory be for a blessing.
I, too, have attended many funerals this year for friends and family members both older and younger than me. It is part of the reason I've become so removed from my usual activity and engagement. My own mortality is staring me in the face, and I find it difficult to write about it. But I'm still working on it.
My condolences, Don. <3